THIS IS A WORK OF FICTION. I AM NOT PLANNING ON KILLING MYSELF. SOME CONFUSION CAME UP ON THAT POINT. NOT TO WORRY.
13. Haunted
Hey Joe,
Is it nice where you are? It has to be, right? Why else would you go there and leave us here. Here sucks. Do you miss it? I cant imagine why you would. Like I said, here sucks. At least, it does now that here no longer includes you.
Whyd you leave? Was it something I did wrong? Kevin? Frankie? Mom? Dad? Could we have stopped you? Was there something we could have done? Said? Would anything have made you change your mind? And when is it that you made up your mind? Why did you make that decision? Why? Why? Why?
Today the sun was shining. Yesterday was the first day we took the cover off the pool, and today the pool guy came to make sure the chlorine levels were safe and that it was the right temperature. We put up the hammock a few days ago, and today the shade was perfectly covering it. And you know what? We all sat inside. No one said it out loud, but we all knew that everyone was thinking it. This was a perfect day in the eyes of Joe Jonas.
Are there times like that where you are? Where the sun is shining and everything seems to be in place? I bet there is. How could there not be?
Did you know that most people who
take themselves dont leave a note? I dont know the actual statistic, but Im pretty sure its not exactly
pleasant. Whyd you choose to go against the odds? Im so glad that you did. Im so glad that I got to hear what you had to say one last time. Even if it wasnt something I really wanted to hear
or I guess read, in this case.
Speaking of that
note. Did you mean what you said? About
me. Us? How you
felt? If you did, it breaks my heart. Why didnt you tell me? I
think we
could have
figured
something out.
Joe, Im going to stop with this lying thing Im doing. Well, not actually lying, but I am being overly nice. The point of me writing this to you is
I need to get some things off my chest. Okay, here I go:
I love you Joe. Just like you said you loved me
Why you decided to
take yourself, Ill never fully understand. Sure, I could read the note you left. I could dissect each and every word. I could rip apart your room (which until this point, no one had even gone in) trying to find something, anything, to find out why you did this to me. To all of us. We miss you Joe. No matter how many times I say it, I can never express how much we need you here.
I remember the last time I saw you alive. I hate to say that: The last time I saw you alive. But the fact of the matter is, you are dead. Youre not coming back. No matter of wishing could make that happen. Anyway, you were wearing a red t-shirt and black pants. You straightened your hair that morning, just how I liked it. I never told you that I preferred it that way, but I did. We talked. We laughed. You were smiling. You were happy.
What changed Joe? WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO US?!
I was just re-reading your note Joe, trying to figure out what was going through your mind. Nothing more than I got before. Just the same sentences, the same words, the same meaning behind it. Do you know how these words cut me Joe?
The world is a bleak place. I understand that now. I understand that the brief shining moments where things seem to go right are too vastly out numbered by the times that they dont. By the time you read this, Ill be gone. Dead. There is nothing any of you can do. What I am about to do is selfish and wrong.
Whyd you write that Joe? Do you not understand what you did? YOU KILLED YOURSELF! And thats not even all you wrote. The rest is too painful to re-write. I cant even think about it right now.
I used to think that people who took themselves were selfish, but not you Joe. Even after everything Ive said, I dont think youre selfish. I could never think that Joe.
Im not going to go on and on, even though I could. I just have one last thing to say.
If youre reading this Joe, I forgive you. I forgive what you did. I forgive you for leaving yourself in a place where I would find you dead when I was home alone. Even though these events are enough to shake me for life, I forgive you.
Im not sure how much longer Ill be here Joe. Im sure to see you soon, for living without you isnt something I think I can handle.
I love you now until the end of time,
Nicholas Jerry Jonas, your baby brother
















Comments
but i loved it
--
There's Strong, then there's Army Strong. Then there's the strong you need to be an Army Girlfriend.
It's good to know that you like... loved it
--
Sticks and stones may break my bones but whips and chains excite me
Let Me Bleed In Peace [link]
Proud stalker of Nick Jonas (he watched BTTF 11.28)
PROCRASTINATORS UNITE!
...tomorrow
--
"Thanks for letting me use your pole Joe!"- Macy from JONAS
---
United we stand;
United we fall;
You can try and get rid of one Joick fan;
But you can't get rid of us all.
----
"What's out of place when you look into the mirror?
The truth is blurry but the lies are getting clearer
Your eyes are fixed, your smile is so elastic
You gave me roses but they're all just made of plastic"
-"Falling Down"; Selena Gomez and The Scene
-----
Some of you think I dont talk very much, kinda true, but its not because I dont like to talk its just cause I have nothin to say -Nick Jonas
--
"Now That's What I'm talking about!"-Joe Lucas,JONAS
Me:"It's Joe Jonas!
Joe Jonas:"Oh Hi Christy
Me:"
Joe:"
Me:"
--
Sticks and stones may break my bones but whips and chains excite me
Let Me Bleed In Peace [link]
Proud stalker of Nick Jonas (he watched BTTF 11.28)
PROCRASTINATORS UNITE!
...tomorrow
The dream? Someone committed suicide. That's it. Originally it was going to be a normal story, but then I thought I'd challange myself (that's the point of the 100 Themes) and write it all in letter form.
I'm glad.
--
Sticks and stones may break my bones but whips and chains excite me
Let Me Bleed In Peace [link]
Proud stalker of Nick Jonas (he watched BTTF 11.28)
PROCRASTINATORS UNITE!
...tomorrow
--
You are my day time, my night time, my world, you are my life
"I LOVE SPACKLE!" - Kevin
DON'T CRY... I hate making people cry
--
Sticks and stones may break my bones but whips and chains excite me
Let Me Bleed In Peace [link]
Proud stalker of Nick Jonas (he watched BTTF 11.28)
PROCRASTINATORS UNITE!
...tomorrow
ACTUALLY I loved this fanfic and it really is beautiful in a sickening kind away ;D <3 no really I love it.
I actually didnt cry =]
YAY KRYSS(for not crying)
and YAY YOU! (for writing this amazingness)
loveeeeittt
--
MuchLove..xoxo
JUSICK.. well it's a Justin Russo and Nick Jonas pairing. Of course!
A simple girl; with a creative mind^-^
~Suffercate11
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